Job Description for a Mother

NEEDED: an appointment arranging, baby bouncing, chocolate craving, duty delegating, excitement evoking, finger feeding, garden growing, home heartening, IQ increasing, job juggling, knee kissing, leftover loving, milk mopping, naptime needing, object organizing, peek-a-boo playing, quiver quieting, rhyme reading, stain scrubbing, temperature taking, ultimatum uttering, vomit vanquishing, wound washing, x-ray examining, yip yapping, zipper zipping woman.

NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. However, interior design skills are useful. Anger management courses are helpful. Emergency Medical Training is essential.

HOURS: 168 hours/week. 52 weeks/year. Holidays are especially busy.


BENEFITS: immeasurable love, joy and fulfillment.
(PS. I wrote this for a little writing contest a while back.)


  1. Emily, there you are! I didn't know you changed blogs. I thought you were just busy with your new one. It looks great and so does your newly expanded family! Congrats!

    -Sarah Williams

  2. I like the "No experience necessary" part, because sometimes I'm nervous about qualifying!

  3. Then you'll do great. As long as you care, you'll do what's best for them.